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Alone? Well I've had the new friends I've made here. Sylvain comes over now and then...
[She rests a hand on her cheek, tilting her head to the side. Alone? Are any of them alone here? It's so easy for them to see other people in this place.]
What do you mean, dear?
[She rests a hand on her cheek, tilting her head to the side. Alone? Are any of them alone here? It's so easy for them to see other people in this place.]
What do you mean, dear?
( continued from here )
[ He's not really sure what's going on and he would assume, as Sylvain suggested—That Felix has been suffering some effects of the moons here to end up keeping to himself. He wouldn't entirely blame him either— as he's witnessed, the moons are able to influence a person's identity itself at times. It's no wonder that many would feel a bit ashamed after it.
As he waits, once he's showered at the building's gym showers and is relaxing, dressed down rather simply, a modern long sleeved shirt and slacks— even in the cold of the changing air, and he pauses as he looks towards Felix arriving there. ]
Ah, there you are. It's good to see you Felix.
[ More than he's expressing— here he thought Felix had genuinely been put off by him and he'd wanted to mend that bridge in some way. ]
What brought on this sudden visit?
[ He's not really sure what's going on and he would assume, as Sylvain suggested—That Felix has been suffering some effects of the moons here to end up keeping to himself. He wouldn't entirely blame him either— as he's witnessed, the moons are able to influence a person's identity itself at times. It's no wonder that many would feel a bit ashamed after it.
As he waits, once he's showered at the building's gym showers and is relaxing, dressed down rather simply, a modern long sleeved shirt and slacks— even in the cold of the changing air, and he pauses as he looks towards Felix arriving there. ]
Ah, there you are. It's good to see you Felix.
[ More than he's expressing— here he thought Felix had genuinely been put off by him and he'd wanted to mend that bridge in some way. ]
What brought on this sudden visit?
[ He's definitely suffered the effects of the moons, and has decided that it's completely embarrassing to show his face to those he loves. Except Sylvain but their bond is slightly different than his bond with everyone else. Most of the time he's been quick to accept relief from people who barely know him at all...
But that doesn't matter. Because he's not even here for that reason.Although if it happens..
He'd seen Edelgard and the meeting with her could have gone a lot worse, but it was still something that wore on Felix a bit. He'd had to remember their dead schoolmates, the betrayals, their childhood losses, and ... what Edelgard's very existence had done to Dimitri. It bothered Felix tremendously. He was always rough on his liege but now that the war's over (in his timeline anyway), there's just that tiny edge of softness he's gained back for him. He'll always be a beast, but he's a beast who's overcome some of his demons, and Felix is happy following him to the ends of the world. ]
... I didn't realize it had been so long.
[ So he's trying to say he didn't mean to avoid Dimitri. In all fairness though, he didn't want to interrupt the googly eyes at Byleth either ... ]
Why do I have to have a reason?
But that doesn't matter. Because he's not even here for that reason.
He'd seen Edelgard and the meeting with her could have gone a lot worse, but it was still something that wore on Felix a bit. He'd had to remember their dead schoolmates, the betrayals, their childhood losses, and ... what Edelgard's very existence had done to Dimitri. It bothered Felix tremendously. He was always rough on his liege but now that the war's over (in his timeline anyway), there's just that tiny edge of softness he's gained back for him. He'll always be a beast, but he's a beast who's overcome some of his demons, and Felix is happy following him to the ends of the world. ]
... I didn't realize it had been so long.
[ So he's trying to say he didn't mean to avoid Dimitri. In all fairness though, he didn't want to interrupt the googly eyes at Byleth either ... ]
Why do I have to have a reason?
[ Felix is one of the people Dimitri always holds some guilt over— over Glenn, and Rodrigue, especially. But mostly, for the friend that he misses having. Duscur changed them, yes, but while his friends had been given A+ Ranks with each other IS were cowards and kept Dimitri from enjoying that goddammit IS been able to maintain their bonds with each other...
He certainly did feel like he wasn't quite where his friends were with each other. So he had no right to demand more from them.
He wouldn't, anyway.
At the very least, with the war having ended... he'd hope that Felix would forgive him and ease on his disdain for him. Especially with him now governing his lands...
The thought makes Dimitri's heart ache, knowing and forever intending to carry the guilt of Felix losing his father because of him. But he aims to do whatever he can for his friend, as King and liege, and he approaches him to stand before him.
(He almost seems cute like this.)
With a softer look, he gives him a nod. ]
My door is always open to you, Felix. Ephraim and Eirika miss you as well.
[ The kitties, who are growing well! He turns and motions ahead. ]
Walk with me? I want to hear what you've been doing. And.. discuss a matter regarding a certain new arrival here.
[ He obviously means Edelgard, but he wants to get the bad news out of the way first. ]
He certainly did feel like he wasn't quite where his friends were with each other. So he had no right to demand more from them.
He wouldn't, anyway.
At the very least, with the war having ended... he'd hope that Felix would forgive him and ease on his disdain for him. Especially with him now governing his lands...
The thought makes Dimitri's heart ache, knowing and forever intending to carry the guilt of Felix losing his father because of him. But he aims to do whatever he can for his friend, as King and liege, and he approaches him to stand before him.
(He almost seems cute like this.)
With a softer look, he gives him a nod. ]
My door is always open to you, Felix. Ephraim and Eirika miss you as well.
[ The kitties, who are growing well! He turns and motions ahead. ]
Walk with me? I want to hear what you've been doing. And.. discuss a matter regarding a certain new arrival here.
[ He obviously means Edelgard, but he wants to get the bad news out of the way first. ]
[ Felix can't deny that there are some darker feelings about the whole Rodrigue situation, and of Glenn too. He can't fault Dimitri for mourning the man's death though. And he tries not to let his weird lingering feelings of familial abandonment leak into things all that often. He has treated the "boar prince" with enough disdain without all that...
There absolutely should have been A+ ranks but that is what RP is for now Felix actively chose to support Dimitri, and he hopes that the other understands the significance of that choice. He hopes that his loyalty hasn't been questioned or, at least, is not questioned anymore. ]
I'm ... sorry, for not visiting.
[ Wait what. Yes, an apology, but don't expect him to repeat it. Seriously though, he and Dimitri are neighbors and Felix has still not put in enough effort. He does regret that. It's just ... yeah. Things have been embarrassing. He would like to see the kitties again too.
With a nod, he agrees to go walking with Dimitri. He's not sure how much of "what he's been doing" he wants to share, but ... ]
So you're aware she's here. [ He looks grim for a second. ] I met up with her.
I'm ... sorry, for not visiting.
[ Wait what. Yes, an apology, but don't expect him to repeat it. Seriously though, he and Dimitri are neighbors and Felix has still not put in enough effort. He does regret that. It's just ... yeah. Things have been embarrassing. He would like to see the kitties again too.
With a nod, he agrees to go walking with Dimitri. He's not sure how much of "what he's been doing" he wants to share, but ... ]
So you're aware she's here. [ He looks grim for a second. ] I met up with her.
[ continued from here ]
[ And he certainly has no hesitation, finding where Byleth is and without waiting, he'll... come over and wrap his arms around him and push his face into the side of his neck.
He can't say much, though his lashes are wet from the little crying he did earlier, so. ]
You didn't have to. Yet I'd have wondered if you were cross with me if you hadn't.
[ Let him be big lion cub okay. ]
[ And he certainly has no hesitation, finding where Byleth is and without waiting, he'll... come over and wrap his arms around him and push his face into the side of his neck.
He can't say much, though his lashes are wet from the little crying he did earlier, so. ]
You didn't have to. Yet I'd have wondered if you were cross with me if you hadn't.
[ Let him be big lion cub okay. ]
[ Ah, well... this is unexpected. Byleth had been in the middle of stirring the chocolate, but he doesn't mind setting the spoon down to indulge Dimitri, reaching back to run his fingers over his hair and the back of his neck then turning his own face to brush his mouth to his cheek. It's then that he notices the remnants of moisture clinging to Dimitri's bottom lids, making him turn around so he can face him completely.
Both hands cup Dimitri's face, forcing his former student to look at him before pushing up on his toes so he can kiss the wet spot gently. ]
Why would you think I was cross?
[ He knows he's hard to read, but he likes to think he's a little more expressive when he's livid. ]
Both hands cup Dimitri's face, forcing his former student to look at him before pushing up on his toes so he can kiss the wet spot gently. ]
Why would you think I was cross?
[ He knows he's hard to read, but he likes to think he's a little more expressive when he's livid. ]
[ This is true peace... he feels like the world is absolutely wrong without Byleth there. Even if so much of their time here is spent doing other busywork, but he does make it a point to come back to him.
No matter what, no matter how— he's the only one he'd have in his arms.
He pauses, quiet as he allows Byleth to kiss him, his own hands cupping his head as he opens his eye, gazing upon that face he cannot ever get out of his heart and thoughts. He's quiet as he speaks, before releasing a soft sigh and smile. ]
Because I'm a fool who cannot give you the happiness you are truly deserving of. Yet here you are, accepting what little I can give.
[ He moves his head so that he can plant a small kiss on Byleth's forehead. ]
I've missed you.
[ Ever since Byleth stopped staying long in his room, he's felt a little out of sorts. ]
No matter what, no matter how— he's the only one he'd have in his arms.
He pauses, quiet as he allows Byleth to kiss him, his own hands cupping his head as he opens his eye, gazing upon that face he cannot ever get out of his heart and thoughts. He's quiet as he speaks, before releasing a soft sigh and smile. ]
Because I'm a fool who cannot give you the happiness you are truly deserving of. Yet here you are, accepting what little I can give.
[ He moves his head so that he can plant a small kiss on Byleth's forehead. ]
I've missed you.
[ Ever since Byleth stopped staying long in his room, he's felt a little out of sorts. ]
[ He'd be surprised if Felix didn't have some unpleasant thoughts regarding that. It's not like they've been able to address any of it in a while..
But after everything they've been through, he does indeed realize how important it is that he doesn't let Felix down. Especially after all the pain he's caused him— knowing that he still supports him...
The apology alone, makes him still for a bit, feeling a rush of warmth swarming the base of his head and to his ears. To hear such comforting words from Felix isn't the norm, but he's afraid if he teases him too much, he'll storm off. He doesn't want that right now...
So he acknowledges if, quietly. ]
I am to blame as well. This place... it's been rather... busy. But that's why we must make up for it now, Felix.
[ He's quiet as Felix speaks, then, as they walk together to the park that the path from their building leads to. ]
.. as for Edelgard... I spoke to her. She seemed frightened, if hiding it well. She also told me she'd run into you and Sylvain.
[ He sighs, looking ahead of him. ]
She's from before any of her painful actions progressed. I do not wish to have her live in a constant state of fear while here. I assured her that there would be no more threats to her from us.
[ He pauses, looking over at Felix with a softer look. ]
We don't need to have conflict here, even if it doesn't erase the years of sadness we endured. But this place is not to be our judgment ground. Or hers.
[ He hopes Felix understands. ]
... it also seems as though she has her own Professor. One that did not choose to stay with us... and one that is not a man.
[ And he's more confused about that. ]
Our world makes even less sense lately, doesn't it?
But after everything they've been through, he does indeed realize how important it is that he doesn't let Felix down. Especially after all the pain he's caused him— knowing that he still supports him...
The apology alone, makes him still for a bit, feeling a rush of warmth swarming the base of his head and to his ears. To hear such comforting words from Felix isn't the norm, but he's afraid if he teases him too much, he'll storm off. He doesn't want that right now...
So he acknowledges if, quietly. ]
I am to blame as well. This place... it's been rather... busy. But that's why we must make up for it now, Felix.
[ He's quiet as Felix speaks, then, as they walk together to the park that the path from their building leads to. ]
.. as for Edelgard... I spoke to her. She seemed frightened, if hiding it well. She also told me she'd run into you and Sylvain.
[ He sighs, looking ahead of him. ]
She's from before any of her painful actions progressed. I do not wish to have her live in a constant state of fear while here. I assured her that there would be no more threats to her from us.
[ He pauses, looking over at Felix with a softer look. ]
We don't need to have conflict here, even if it doesn't erase the years of sadness we endured. But this place is not to be our judgment ground. Or hers.
[ He hopes Felix understands. ]
... it also seems as though she has her own Professor. One that did not choose to stay with us... and one that is not a man.
[ And he's more confused about that. ]
Our world makes even less sense lately, doesn't it?
[ Sylvain's words echo back to him as he considers his own actions and always trying to accommodate Dimitri when he should have been less skittish. Less avoidant. He should have told him everything the moment he learned. He should have asked him to crawl into his bed, to give into him, to surrender, to love him... instead of waiting so long, giving Dimitri reason to doubt his own feelings.
He never wanted him to feel this way at all.
Both hands move down his arms and take Dimitri's fingers between his own as he struggles with how to start -where to start. He can't keep hiding from the truth, and even if it should tear them apart, he has to face that reality now. ]
You don't have to.
[ He really wants to stay by his side. ]
You make me happy.
[ Happier than he ever thought he could be after losing his father. Dimitri and the rest of his former students had become his family in his stead. ]
But there's something you should know about me, about the crests, about Rhea... do you want me to continue?
He never wanted him to feel this way at all.
Both hands move down his arms and take Dimitri's fingers between his own as he struggles with how to start -where to start. He can't keep hiding from the truth, and even if it should tear them apart, he has to face that reality now. ]
You don't have to.
[ He really wants to stay by his side. ]
You make me happy.
[ Happier than he ever thought he could be after losing his father. Dimitri and the rest of his former students had become his family in his stead. ]
But there's something you should know about me, about the crests, about Rhea... do you want me to continue?
[ In all honesty, he'd simply assumed that Byleth felt that he wasn't quite ready for the commitment he'd proposed to him. And he wouldn't blame him for thinking so— with how things were here, with the urges they inflicted on others...
Dimitri had managed to avoid most interactions that would make him feel guilty, and only doing what he could out of necessity of the situation— but his mind eventually brought back thoughts of Byleth. Of whether Byleth was enjoying himself more with someone else— if he would rather they...
He'd often have to catch himself when his thoughts went that way. Because in the end, Byleth has no reason to be with him in any form, outside of his own feelings for him. And he knows he can't demand that, regardless of how he feels. He knows what he feels, and he accepts whatever Byleth feels— and so he began to accept when Byleth wouldn't join him in bed after a while, he began to accept when their evenings would be spent with people other than each other... they'd have to live their own lives while accepting a lot.
He thought he was fine, so the sudden show of love threw him off guard. Had he been assuming wrongly and distancing himself from the one he loved? That was what had brought on his tears, and now, as Byleth speaks, he watches him curiously. ]
I have not had the chance to speak with her... or know that she was present.
[ The Archbishop was here all this time...? He frowns, feeling a little foolish for not looking more closely. ]
What is it, beloved? We'd not yet found her in my memory, but...
[ He looks at him, encouraging him to continue. ]
Dimitri had managed to avoid most interactions that would make him feel guilty, and only doing what he could out of necessity of the situation— but his mind eventually brought back thoughts of Byleth. Of whether Byleth was enjoying himself more with someone else— if he would rather they...
He'd often have to catch himself when his thoughts went that way. Because in the end, Byleth has no reason to be with him in any form, outside of his own feelings for him. And he knows he can't demand that, regardless of how he feels. He knows what he feels, and he accepts whatever Byleth feels— and so he began to accept when Byleth wouldn't join him in bed after a while, he began to accept when their evenings would be spent with people other than each other... they'd have to live their own lives while accepting a lot.
He thought he was fine, so the sudden show of love threw him off guard. Had he been assuming wrongly and distancing himself from the one he loved? That was what had brought on his tears, and now, as Byleth speaks, he watches him curiously. ]
I have not had the chance to speak with her... or know that she was present.
[ The Archbishop was here all this time...? He frowns, feeling a little foolish for not looking more closely. ]
What is it, beloved? We'd not yet found her in my memory, but...
[ He looks at him, encouraging him to continue. ]
She is. She came to my apartment when she arrived.
[ It was by chance that she had stumbled in, but maybe fate had also played a role, considering what they had ended up speaking of. ]
She's from a different path. I had lead Claude's house, but many truths remain between the two.
[ He has no reason to believe they would be any different considering how many facts line up. His hands tighten around Dimitri's as he braces himself, though he's not used to having to speak this much in one sitting. Still, if he doesn't tell him now, he won't be able to continue in good conscience. ]
When I was young, I dreamt often about a young girl speaking to me. I told my father about it but no one else.
[ Even his father thought it was a little strange. Byleth couldn't imagine how others would have reacted. ]
The day we met, the dreams took a more real shape until I could see her and hear her. She was the goddess mother of Seiros whose memories were forsaken from her death.
[ The more he hears it out loud, the more he realizes how insane it's starting to sound. Visions of deities and all... but Dimitri had been there the day they had fused. He had to have known he had some connection to the divine. ]
Rhea told me I was created to be her vessel. My father infused with Rhea's blood and my mother, a copy of the goddess mother- when they had me, I was on the brink of death. Only the crest kept me alive at the cost of my mother's life.
[ His hand moves to his chest where the crest seems to glow in response before he chances a glance at Dimitri's face to make sure he's not ready to bolt. ]
It's the heart of the goddess, Sothis.
[ He moves Dimitri's hand to his chest as well, letting him feel it there. The absence of a heart beat, proof that two of them are separated by more than just their societal positions. The unspoken truth is that they will always have this fundamental difference, and he's not sure if Dimitri will want to cope with that realization. ]
[ It was by chance that she had stumbled in, but maybe fate had also played a role, considering what they had ended up speaking of. ]
She's from a different path. I had lead Claude's house, but many truths remain between the two.
[ He has no reason to believe they would be any different considering how many facts line up. His hands tighten around Dimitri's as he braces himself, though he's not used to having to speak this much in one sitting. Still, if he doesn't tell him now, he won't be able to continue in good conscience. ]
When I was young, I dreamt often about a young girl speaking to me. I told my father about it but no one else.
[ Even his father thought it was a little strange. Byleth couldn't imagine how others would have reacted. ]
The day we met, the dreams took a more real shape until I could see her and hear her. She was the goddess mother of Seiros whose memories were forsaken from her death.
[ The more he hears it out loud, the more he realizes how insane it's starting to sound. Visions of deities and all... but Dimitri had been there the day they had fused. He had to have known he had some connection to the divine. ]
Rhea told me I was created to be her vessel. My father infused with Rhea's blood and my mother, a copy of the goddess mother- when they had me, I was on the brink of death. Only the crest kept me alive at the cost of my mother's life.
[ His hand moves to his chest where the crest seems to glow in response before he chances a glance at Dimitri's face to make sure he's not ready to bolt. ]
It's the heart of the goddess, Sothis.
[ He moves Dimitri's hand to his chest as well, letting him feel it there. The absence of a heart beat, proof that two of them are separated by more than just their societal positions. The unspoken truth is that they will always have this fundamental difference, and he's not sure if Dimitri will want to cope with that realization. ]
[ Dimitri listens, because he doesn't want to interrupt— doesn't want to miss a moment of the rare time Byleth does speak. He watches him, quiet and firm, absorbing what becomes more and more strange information—
He always knew something was different about Byleth, but with all that had occurred— so fast and one after the other, there really was no time to linger on it all. Especially when they found out the identity of the Flame Emperor so soon after it... and there was so little time to actually sit and talk.
However, as Byleth moves his hand to his chest, Dimitri does tense, if only in the realization that he somehow never noticed this when he held Byleth. And he's held him enough times since coming here, which makes his mouth part in surprise and his single eye widen in shock as he looks over at him.
He composes himself moments after, but it takes him some time to process it. His expression softens, but also grows troubled as he shifts his hand to slide up the side of Byleth's neck, looking sharply into his eyes.
His words are laced with guilt— and perhaps a hint of hurt. ]
Why did it take you so long to tell me?
[ He'd had such troubling thoughts about why Byleth had suddenly grown distant, each one worrying that he'd been the cause, when— he hadn't even mattered. Byleth was suffering alone, wearing this burden, and he didn't seek to tell him? ]
After I asked you to— that no matter what the problem, we'd get through it together...
[ His other hand lifts to cup the other side of Byleth's face. ]
Why would you suffer alone when you didn't have to?
[ Unless he did tell someone else— someone far more trustworthy to him. He wouldn't blame him, but what good is he if he can't even bear the burden of his beloved's pain together with him? ]
He always knew something was different about Byleth, but with all that had occurred— so fast and one after the other, there really was no time to linger on it all. Especially when they found out the identity of the Flame Emperor so soon after it... and there was so little time to actually sit and talk.
However, as Byleth moves his hand to his chest, Dimitri does tense, if only in the realization that he somehow never noticed this when he held Byleth. And he's held him enough times since coming here, which makes his mouth part in surprise and his single eye widen in shock as he looks over at him.
He composes himself moments after, but it takes him some time to process it. His expression softens, but also grows troubled as he shifts his hand to slide up the side of Byleth's neck, looking sharply into his eyes.
His words are laced with guilt— and perhaps a hint of hurt. ]
Why did it take you so long to tell me?
[ He'd had such troubling thoughts about why Byleth had suddenly grown distant, each one worrying that he'd been the cause, when— he hadn't even mattered. Byleth was suffering alone, wearing this burden, and he didn't seek to tell him? ]
After I asked you to— that no matter what the problem, we'd get through it together...
[ His other hand lifts to cup the other side of Byleth's face. ]
Why would you suffer alone when you didn't have to?
[ Unless he did tell someone else— someone far more trustworthy to him. He wouldn't blame him, but what good is he if he can't even bear the burden of his beloved's pain together with him? ]
[ The guilt is eating him up just as much for not having spoken anything sooner. The shock of it hadn't quite worn off for some time, and he had been afraid of things ending when they had just begun. The thought of losing someone he'd come to love over the years they'd known one another... the thought of being seen differently... he had just gotten Dimitri to start using his name every once in a while.
He leans into Dimitri's hand as his expression finally crumbles from its usual passive visage to something genuinely hurt and worried. ]
I didn't want this to change.
[ He'd thought if he gave Dimitri his space, gave him room to grow and explore, to be with others, maybe he could at least find happiness elsewhere with someone he could grow old with. Maybe someone who could give him an heir.
But he's fooling himself thinking he'd be happy so long as Dimitri's happy.
His arms suddenly wrap around his waist as he pushes his face into the side of Dimitri's neck and simply inhales him. The thought of him with anyone else makes his chest ache even if he knows there's nothing they can do about it here, and the thought of separating permanently makes the backs of his eyes burn hotly. ]
Selfishly, I want you, no matter what. Sothis saved me when I was pulled into that other realm. We fused, we became one, but it's still me. Rhea may have wanted her to take control... but it's still me.
[ And he had nearly lost Dimitri too many times for his own comfort. ]
Stay.
He leans into Dimitri's hand as his expression finally crumbles from its usual passive visage to something genuinely hurt and worried. ]
I didn't want this to change.
[ He'd thought if he gave Dimitri his space, gave him room to grow and explore, to be with others, maybe he could at least find happiness elsewhere with someone he could grow old with. Maybe someone who could give him an heir.
But he's fooling himself thinking he'd be happy so long as Dimitri's happy.
His arms suddenly wrap around his waist as he pushes his face into the side of Dimitri's neck and simply inhales him. The thought of him with anyone else makes his chest ache even if he knows there's nothing they can do about it here, and the thought of separating permanently makes the backs of his eyes burn hotly. ]
Selfishly, I want you, no matter what. Sothis saved me when I was pulled into that other realm. We fused, we became one, but it's still me. Rhea may have wanted her to take control... but it's still me.
[ And he had nearly lost Dimitri too many times for his own comfort. ]
Stay.
[ In this moment, Byleth seems so much smaller and vulnerable than he's ever seen him, and that alone makes him wrap his arms tightly around his body. Mercenary or Professor, he's always fit so well in his hold that it's like he belongs there. And more than that—
He's been the one to stand by him and return him to the light. How could he continue to be so blind while his beloved suffered this loneliness, this pain of knowledge that he too, cannot comprehend enough...
I didn't want this to change....
The way Byleth looks right then tears him up inside, and he pulls him into his arms without another word, his hand rising to bury his fingers in the hair on the back of his head. Lightened and radiant, that shock of spirituality and divine etched in the strands—
He pushes his lips against his jaw and kisses him, before he replies, firm in his reassurance. ]
I know it's you. I've never doubted it, Byleth.
[ Fused with a goddess or not... he squeezes Byleth close as he tries to sort out his thoughts. ]
I don't know why you'd think anything would change. I'd already seen you return from an impossible situation before. I've seen you make miracles happen. Why wouldn't I believe that you are still the same man I love beyond anyone else?
[ He can feel his heart sink as he keeps Byleth close. ]
No matter who we're with here, no matter our feelings... in the end, I'd still come back to you, beloved. Because I'm yours.
[ He's not a Dimitri from another path. He's his Dimitri. Carefully peeling himself back but not too far to be separated from the heat and warmth of his body, Dimitri brings his hand back to cup Byleth's cheek. ]
Nothing would change who you are. I would follow you to the very end, my love. I promised you that, and I hold that promise even now. You are Byleth. My Byleth. Why would you not believe me when I said it the first time?
[ He smiles faintly, wanting him to see that even if this is hard to process, he means every word. ]
It's not wise for a professor to not listen, is it?
He's been the one to stand by him and return him to the light. How could he continue to be so blind while his beloved suffered this loneliness, this pain of knowledge that he too, cannot comprehend enough...
I didn't want this to change....
The way Byleth looks right then tears him up inside, and he pulls him into his arms without another word, his hand rising to bury his fingers in the hair on the back of his head. Lightened and radiant, that shock of spirituality and divine etched in the strands—
He pushes his lips against his jaw and kisses him, before he replies, firm in his reassurance. ]
I know it's you. I've never doubted it, Byleth.
[ Fused with a goddess or not... he squeezes Byleth close as he tries to sort out his thoughts. ]
I don't know why you'd think anything would change. I'd already seen you return from an impossible situation before. I've seen you make miracles happen. Why wouldn't I believe that you are still the same man I love beyond anyone else?
[ He can feel his heart sink as he keeps Byleth close. ]
No matter who we're with here, no matter our feelings... in the end, I'd still come back to you, beloved. Because I'm yours.
[ He's not a Dimitri from another path. He's his Dimitri. Carefully peeling himself back but not too far to be separated from the heat and warmth of his body, Dimitri brings his hand back to cup Byleth's cheek. ]
Nothing would change who you are. I would follow you to the very end, my love. I promised you that, and I hold that promise even now. You are Byleth. My Byleth. Why would you not believe me when I said it the first time?
[ He smiles faintly, wanting him to see that even if this is hard to process, he means every word. ]
It's not wise for a professor to not listen, is it?
[ His lips quirk at the edges as he touches the back of Dimitri's hand with his own, fingers molding their way along his, flesh to flesh. He should have had more faith that Dimitri would not have minded even if he still has plenty of preoccupations himself. He's not sure what this will mean for them in the future or when they return to their own world. He's not even sure what would happen were his body to go back into the same slumber that kept him out of Dimitri's life for five years. If he disappeared again and woke up to a changed world, his heart would break. He doesn't want to miss out on any other important moments, especially in Dimitri's life.
But all he can do now is trust that fate will allow them to be together. Otherwise, he'll spend his life rewinding events just so he could spend more time in his company. ]
You are mine, too, Dimitri.
[ Words he'd held on his tongue for too long. He's glad to give them life now as he doesn't want to hide anything more from him, no matter how difficult. He may not be completely human, but their bond anchors him, keeps him grounded. ]
There is something else. The truth about you and your friends.
[ It's important he also share this with him now as it may change their perception and how they come to view the crests from here on out. He knows there's a lot that Dimitri would have trouble forgiving as far as Rhea is concerned -Byleth already has a difficult time trusting her- but he should know all sides of the story before he makes any judgments. ]
Sothis and her children lived in Zanado, but they were slain by humans. Their bones and their hearts formed the relics and the crests you now wield, inherited by the Ten Elites who took them. Rhea -no, Seiros-... she wove her own tale.
[ Everything she had done had been in the name of vengeance and in order to see her mother, something he could sympathize with to an extent. If there was a way to bring his father back, he would have taken it, but not at the expense of others' livelihoods. ]
Talk to her.
[ It's important that, as king, he unravels those misconceptions himself. Byleth has his own opinions, but he'd rather they all made peace with the past so they could focus on building the future of Fódlan together. He'll also let Dimitri decide how he wants to break it to Felix and Sylvain, though they may already know. He hadn't yet asked them nor brought it up as he is aware their history with the crests is a lot more checkered than his own.
Before coming to the monastery, his crest had not even had much of an effect on him or his life. To think he could have gone on naively if he hadn't come across Dimitri and the other house leaders that day... ]
But all he can do now is trust that fate will allow them to be together. Otherwise, he'll spend his life rewinding events just so he could spend more time in his company. ]
You are mine, too, Dimitri.
[ Words he'd held on his tongue for too long. He's glad to give them life now as he doesn't want to hide anything more from him, no matter how difficult. He may not be completely human, but their bond anchors him, keeps him grounded. ]
There is something else. The truth about you and your friends.
[ It's important he also share this with him now as it may change their perception and how they come to view the crests from here on out. He knows there's a lot that Dimitri would have trouble forgiving as far as Rhea is concerned -Byleth already has a difficult time trusting her- but he should know all sides of the story before he makes any judgments. ]
Sothis and her children lived in Zanado, but they were slain by humans. Their bones and their hearts formed the relics and the crests you now wield, inherited by the Ten Elites who took them. Rhea -no, Seiros-... she wove her own tale.
[ Everything she had done had been in the name of vengeance and in order to see her mother, something he could sympathize with to an extent. If there was a way to bring his father back, he would have taken it, but not at the expense of others' livelihoods. ]
Talk to her.
[ It's important that, as king, he unravels those misconceptions himself. Byleth has his own opinions, but he'd rather they all made peace with the past so they could focus on building the future of Fódlan together. He'll also let Dimitri decide how he wants to break it to Felix and Sylvain, though they may already know. He hadn't yet asked them nor brought it up as he is aware their history with the crests is a lot more checkered than his own.
Before coming to the monastery, his crest had not even had much of an effect on him or his life. To think he could have gone on naively if he hadn't come across Dimitri and the other house leaders that day... ]
[ They basically haven't addressed it at all, but it's fine. The war is over, that's what actually matters.
He will most definitely storm off if Dimitri tries to tease him, so he makes a wise decision in not mentioning it out loud. Now that Felix has said his apology, he is good to move on from such sentimental topics ... ]
I promised her I would not draw my weapon.
[ So like, he definitely feels like he put in a valiant effort at their meeting. However, she thought that she and Felix could work together toward a common goal and that he's not quite on board with just yet. Even if she is from a time before she's a complete witch, he still feels that doesn't pardon her.
She was thinking about being a complete witch long before any of them even realized it, after all. ]
I won't forgive her for what she's done.
[ To Dimitri, specifically. ]
But I've been civil.
[ He puts his hands up, shrugging his shoulders a bit. Basically, he's not sure what else he can offer on that front. As for the professor ... yeah he has also already met that one. And touched her boob. ]
I don't know how the female one can be the same professor and have sided with her, but. I don't see a reason to make an enemy of her here either. If our professor is fine with her presence then it's no matter.
[ a small sigh, and a nod. ]
Nothing about any of this makes a lot of sense.
He will most definitely storm off if Dimitri tries to tease him, so he makes a wise decision in not mentioning it out loud. Now that Felix has said his apology, he is good to move on from such sentimental topics ... ]
I promised her I would not draw my weapon.
[ So like, he definitely feels like he put in a valiant effort at their meeting. However, she thought that she and Felix could work together toward a common goal and that he's not quite on board with just yet. Even if she is from a time before she's a complete witch, he still feels that doesn't pardon her.
She was thinking about being a complete witch long before any of them even realized it, after all. ]
I won't forgive her for what she's done.
[ To Dimitri, specifically. ]
But I've been civil.
[ He puts his hands up, shrugging his shoulders a bit. Basically, he's not sure what else he can offer on that front. As for the professor ... yeah he has also already met that one. And touched her boob. ]
I don't know how the female one can be the same professor and have sided with her, but. I don't see a reason to make an enemy of her here either. If our professor is fine with her presence then it's no matter.
[ a small sigh, and a nod. ]
Nothing about any of this makes a lot of sense.
[ Having time to healthily discuss unhealthy topics? Not in their Fhirdiad, apparently.
To be fair, had Edelgard made that offer of him, he'd have refused too- and might never agree to it, regardless of how he feels now. Expecting it of Felix is even more far-fetched- though somewhere deep down, he knows that it's likely Felix would have turned away from him if he'd fallen too far. And he wouldn't have blamed him for it, either.
But he's glad... this Felix stayed. That he kept some faith in him, and that Byleth- their Byleth, was able to bring him back before he fell too far.
As they step into the park, Dimitri glances to his side where he can see Felix, the way he looks and carries himself- the way he's looking far gentler than his usual guarded manner. He always found Felix worth admiring, even if he carried immense disdain for him, but...
Right now, it's a bit difficult to not be overly aware of how his scent is incredibly palpable and his heat...
He catches himself, turning to look ahead as they stop by the fountain, and he gives it a look-over before speaking again- ]
It's the best we can do, my friend.
[ He wants to touch some boob too but he's not thinking of it right now. After a moment's silence, he turns to face Felix properly. ]
How has this place been treating you? You- [ He holds up a hand- ] - needn't tell me about what makes you uncomfortable. The moons have done some strange things to our selves...
[ His hand then moves to settle on Felix's shoulder. ]
But if there is aught that has troubled you- I don't want you to have to carry the burden alone, Felix. As your friend- more than as a king, I'd hope for you to rely on me.
[ He meets his gaze firmly. ]
Will you allow me to ask this selfish request of you?
To be fair, had Edelgard made that offer of him, he'd have refused too- and might never agree to it, regardless of how he feels now. Expecting it of Felix is even more far-fetched- though somewhere deep down, he knows that it's likely Felix would have turned away from him if he'd fallen too far. And he wouldn't have blamed him for it, either.
But he's glad... this Felix stayed. That he kept some faith in him, and that Byleth- their Byleth, was able to bring him back before he fell too far.
As they step into the park, Dimitri glances to his side where he can see Felix, the way he looks and carries himself- the way he's looking far gentler than his usual guarded manner. He always found Felix worth admiring, even if he carried immense disdain for him, but...
Right now, it's a bit difficult to not be overly aware of how his scent is incredibly palpable and his heat...
He catches himself, turning to look ahead as they stop by the fountain, and he gives it a look-over before speaking again- ]
It's the best we can do, my friend.
[ He wants to touch some boob too but he's not thinking of it right now. After a moment's silence, he turns to face Felix properly. ]
How has this place been treating you? You- [ He holds up a hand- ] - needn't tell me about what makes you uncomfortable. The moons have done some strange things to our selves...
[ His hand then moves to settle on Felix's shoulder. ]
But if there is aught that has troubled you- I don't want you to have to carry the burden alone, Felix. As your friend- more than as a king, I'd hope for you to rely on me.
[ He meets his gaze firmly. ]
Will you allow me to ask this selfish request of you?
[ Never.
At some other time and place, maybe he would have agreed to go with Edelgard. He doesn't know about any alternate self that might have. He can't imagine going against Dimitri at this point, but maybe at some point it had been possible. Dimitri will just have to live with the fact that he's stuck with Felix and Felix will even go so far as to defend Dimitri's honor.
Either he's unaware of Dimitri's gaze on him, or he's pretending he doesn't notice how intense it is. The tips of his ears color slightly but that's the only betrayal of his thoughts. He manages to keep his cheeks a regular human color. He lifts his hands up in a shrug. ]
Suppose so.
[ There really is very little they can do about it at this point, but try and coexist without too much stress or violence. Sure, that's fine.
As he's asked about how this place has treated him, his cheeks do color. It's definitely not something he wants to discuss. Not with anyone. Even telling Sylvain about it is a giant pain in Felix's neck. He opens his mouth to tell Dimitri to stop asking about it, but no sound comes out as the man's hand lands on his shoulder. ]
Hmph. [ He blows hot air out his nose. ] You don't have to say something like that. Obviously it's the same for me.
[ He's already pledged his life to Dimitri. Maybe he'll die with Sylvain but he'll die for his king, and friend. But he sighs, meeting that gaze and feeling how serious Dimitri actually is about it. Maybe he can tone the tsun down a little bit. ]
Fine. But you asked for this.
At some other time and place, maybe he would have agreed to go with Edelgard. He doesn't know about any alternate self that might have. He can't imagine going against Dimitri at this point, but maybe at some point it had been possible. Dimitri will just have to live with the fact that he's stuck with Felix and Felix will even go so far as to defend Dimitri's honor.
Either he's unaware of Dimitri's gaze on him, or he's pretending he doesn't notice how intense it is. The tips of his ears color slightly but that's the only betrayal of his thoughts. He manages to keep his cheeks a regular human color. He lifts his hands up in a shrug. ]
Suppose so.
[ There really is very little they can do about it at this point, but try and coexist without too much stress or violence. Sure, that's fine.
As he's asked about how this place has treated him, his cheeks do color. It's definitely not something he wants to discuss. Not with anyone. Even telling Sylvain about it is a giant pain in Felix's neck. He opens his mouth to tell Dimitri to stop asking about it, but no sound comes out as the man's hand lands on his shoulder. ]
Hmph. [ He blows hot air out his nose. ] You don't have to say something like that. Obviously it's the same for me.
[ He's already pledged his life to Dimitri. Maybe he'll die with Sylvain but he'll die for his king, and friend. But he sighs, meeting that gaze and feeling how serious Dimitri actually is about it. Maybe he can tone the tsun down a little bit. ]
Fine. But you asked for this.
[ That makes his gaze grow a little gentler, and he turns so that he can fully face Felix. Honestly, it's a bit hard to not... Felix has become an astoundingly strapping young warrior, which is a far cry from how cute and squishy he used to be as a child. Always following Sylvain around and crying when he couldn't get his attention...
The thought makes him smile just a bit, and he lifts his gaze to him, meeting Felix's squarely. ]
Then... answer me this, Felix. You aren't.. unhappy here, are you?
[ Because if there is anything making him uncomfortable or unhappy, he'd like to hear it. He doesn't want to cast a blind eye to his ... future? Or present Duke... any more than he doesn't want to look away from his Margrave.
He's not sure how well Felix will be taking to the position, or Sylvain for that matter— but as his most trusted and loyal friends... he cannot be ignorant or trapped in his own head anymore. ]
Has anyone been unkind to you?
The thought makes him smile just a bit, and he lifts his gaze to him, meeting Felix's squarely. ]
Then... answer me this, Felix. You aren't.. unhappy here, are you?
[ Because if there is anything making him uncomfortable or unhappy, he'd like to hear it. He doesn't want to cast a blind eye to his ... future? Or present Duke... any more than he doesn't want to look away from his Margrave.
He's not sure how well Felix will be taking to the position, or Sylvain for that matter— but as his most trusted and loyal friends... he cannot be ignorant or trapped in his own head anymore. ]
Has anyone been unkind to you?
[ He is his...
Something aches in his chest when he hears that, unsure of how to process that bit of information outside of just... hugging Byleth with joy. He was already hurting at the thought that Byleth had changed his mind, that he didn't want him or didn't see anything worth staying with any longer. And he honestly would not have blamed him either, especially after what he'd put everyone through.
Hearing that reaffirmation only makes him hold him close again, though—
What he hears next makes him look at him in surprise. ]
Rhea... is Seiros?
[ Did he hear that right? And the Ten Elites, the bearers of the crests that they all inherited.. what does that make them? He looks a bit lost as he stares at Byleth, unsure of what to think right now. ]
... Byleth— before I speak to her, if she's even willing to speak to me... what does this mean for us? For you and myself? If what you're saying is true, then haven't I been among those that have done you all wrong?
[ He's not even questioning it, Byleth has no reason to lie to him. He just wants to know what this means. ]
Something aches in his chest when he hears that, unsure of how to process that bit of information outside of just... hugging Byleth with joy. He was already hurting at the thought that Byleth had changed his mind, that he didn't want him or didn't see anything worth staying with any longer. And he honestly would not have blamed him either, especially after what he'd put everyone through.
Hearing that reaffirmation only makes him hold him close again, though—
What he hears next makes him look at him in surprise. ]
Rhea... is Seiros?
[ Did he hear that right? And the Ten Elites, the bearers of the crests that they all inherited.. what does that make them? He looks a bit lost as he stares at Byleth, unsure of what to think right now. ]
... Byleth— before I speak to her, if she's even willing to speak to me... what does this mean for us? For you and myself? If what you're saying is true, then haven't I been among those that have done you all wrong?
[ He's not even questioning it, Byleth has no reason to lie to him. He just wants to know what this means. ]
[ One mention of how squishy he used to be and this sentimental outing is over and done with forever, Dimitri.
That aside, Felix does take a moment to ponder the question, a very light frown stitching into his brow. Is he unhappy? He's not thrilled honestly, but it's not like he's dying either. Even with the awful moon cycles, he's pretty well taken care of. By Sylvain or by strangers who won't ask questions or tease him. ]
I'd rather be home.
[ They have a lot of work to do, after all. He was never really prepared to be Duke Fraldarius, but he'll take the role seriously now that he has it. Or will have it. ]
Do you think I couldn't handle it if someone was "unkind"? I'm fine.
That aside, Felix does take a moment to ponder the question, a very light frown stitching into his brow. Is he unhappy? He's not thrilled honestly, but it's not like he's dying either. Even with the awful moon cycles, he's pretty well taken care of. By Sylvain or by strangers who won't ask questions or tease him. ]
I'd rather be home.
[ They have a lot of work to do, after all. He was never really prepared to be Duke Fraldarius, but he'll take the role seriously now that he has it. Or will have it. ]
Do you think I couldn't handle it if someone was "unkind"? I'm fine.
[ Byleth doesn't know if there is a true answer to that. War has many sides, and soldiers die and suffer on either. Both fight for what they believe in, but one must eventually fall. He knows Dimitri wanted peace, and as far as he knows, Edelgard wanted vengeance against the Church. Given what he's learned about the Church, he can't entirely blame her.
He, too, felt anger learning about this past and how he came to be. But if not for Rhea's meddling, he also may have never come to the academy nor would he have changed after becoming the professor of so many wonderful students -now friends of his. One now his love. ]
Dimitri, none of us knew... Humans, your ancestors, they destroyed Rhea's kin for more power, and she retaliated by using their creations for her gain.
[ And using his own father and himself after... ]
All I know is, no matter what I am, it doesn't change how I feel about you.
[ Heart or no heart, he knows he's capable of feeling something for Dimitri. He doesn't know if it's reciprocated entirely, but he wants to believe there is a way for them to be together even if he'll have to bury Dimitri himself. Even if they won't have any heirs. Even if the world may look upon them with scorn. Even if Dimitri will have other lovers in time.
But those are all truths he'll have to accept just as Dimitri will have to accept the truth of Blaiddyd and the other Ten Elites. The truth of the crests. The truth of the dragons that walk amongst them. ]
He, too, felt anger learning about this past and how he came to be. But if not for Rhea's meddling, he also may have never come to the academy nor would he have changed after becoming the professor of so many wonderful students -now friends of his. One now his love. ]
Dimitri, none of us knew... Humans, your ancestors, they destroyed Rhea's kin for more power, and she retaliated by using their creations for her gain.
[ And using his own father and himself after... ]
All I know is, no matter what I am, it doesn't change how I feel about you.
[ Heart or no heart, he knows he's capable of feeling something for Dimitri. He doesn't know if it's reciprocated entirely, but he wants to believe there is a way for them to be together even if he'll have to bury Dimitri himself. Even if they won't have any heirs. Even if the world may look upon them with scorn. Even if Dimitri will have other lovers in time.
But those are all truths he'll have to accept just as Dimitri will have to accept the truth of Blaiddyd and the other Ten Elites. The truth of the crests. The truth of the dragons that walk amongst them. ]
[ He doesn't know how else to tell him how his feelings stand- but together with all of this, there's so much he has to think about. And yet...
And yet.
It's so much easier knowing all of this because he knows Byleth is here, with him, for him to take it all at all. And hearing those words...
He reaches out to take Byleth's hand, tugging him in close as he drops his head near his. Strange, how much smaller he feels against him, even if he's experienced Byleth just being- so much more to him. Like an embrace he never wants to break free of.
His face settling in against the side of his, he closes his eyes as he inhales and lets his thoughts melt against his. ]
I'm glad.
[ Simply, easily... ]
... because my feelings for you cannot be shaken, no matter what this place does, my beloved. I don't...
[ He holds him closer. ]
I don't want to be without you for even a moment. Not in thought, or presence... I want to stand by you no matter what we have to endure.
[ Even now, it's hard to let him go, but he does, slowly- enough to give Byleth some room before he looks into his eyes. ]
I'll speak to her, but when I am ready. If it is alright... I would rather focus on our time now. It's selfish... utterly selfish. But I don't want to be weighed down by things I cannot change while in a place we cannot escape.
[ He's had enough of feeling guilt and shame, and he will never stop feeling them. But if he can have his happiness, even for a moment... ]
... is that alright to want? With you?
[ Is he allowed to be at peace without Byleth doubting him, and without him doubting Byleth's feelings for him? ]
And yet.
It's so much easier knowing all of this because he knows Byleth is here, with him, for him to take it all at all. And hearing those words...
He reaches out to take Byleth's hand, tugging him in close as he drops his head near his. Strange, how much smaller he feels against him, even if he's experienced Byleth just being- so much more to him. Like an embrace he never wants to break free of.
His face settling in against the side of his, he closes his eyes as he inhales and lets his thoughts melt against his. ]
I'm glad.
[ Simply, easily... ]
... because my feelings for you cannot be shaken, no matter what this place does, my beloved. I don't...
[ He holds him closer. ]
I don't want to be without you for even a moment. Not in thought, or presence... I want to stand by you no matter what we have to endure.
[ Even now, it's hard to let him go, but he does, slowly- enough to give Byleth some room before he looks into his eyes. ]
I'll speak to her, but when I am ready. If it is alright... I would rather focus on our time now. It's selfish... utterly selfish. But I don't want to be weighed down by things I cannot change while in a place we cannot escape.
[ He's had enough of feeling guilt and shame, and he will never stop feeling them. But if he can have his happiness, even for a moment... ]
... is that alright to want? With you?
[ Is he allowed to be at peace without Byleth doubting him, and without him doubting Byleth's feelings for him? ]
[ Byleth nods as he curls Dimitri's fingers with his own and brings the back of his hand to his mouth to kiss. Maybe one day they will be more than this just as they had become so much more than teacher and pupil. Maybe one day he will adorn this hand with something of meaning and worth.
Maybe one day he can call Dimitri his in every way.
The corners of his mouth lift as he holds Dimitri's hand for a moment longer, savoring the warmth and hoping he can emit the same. The revelation of being something more than human is still something he's trying to wrap his head around, having spent the bulk of his life simply being his father's son. He doesn't want to lose that connection between them, especially since the similarities he retains to Jeralt are few and far between. But if there's any way he can honor him and remember him, he would.
His father, more than everyone, wanted him to find someone he loves as deeply as he had loved his mother. If not for the circumstances surrounding his birth, they could have been happier together for longer. Byleth has a lot he still resents Rhea for, but killing her -taking vengeance- it wouldn't solve anything.
All he can do now is honor his father's last wish and savor this, hoping they'll find one another again when they return home. That even if they forget this memory, they won't forget how it made them feel. ]
It is. All I want is to know that you accept me as I really am. No more lies or words unspoken.
[ He has nothing left to hide from him, and hopefully, Dimitri feels the same. ]
Can we celebrate your birthday properly now? Stay. Eat with me.
Maybe one day he can call Dimitri his in every way.
The corners of his mouth lift as he holds Dimitri's hand for a moment longer, savoring the warmth and hoping he can emit the same. The revelation of being something more than human is still something he's trying to wrap his head around, having spent the bulk of his life simply being his father's son. He doesn't want to lose that connection between them, especially since the similarities he retains to Jeralt are few and far between. But if there's any way he can honor him and remember him, he would.
His father, more than everyone, wanted him to find someone he loves as deeply as he had loved his mother. If not for the circumstances surrounding his birth, they could have been happier together for longer. Byleth has a lot he still resents Rhea for, but killing her -taking vengeance- it wouldn't solve anything.
All he can do now is honor his father's last wish and savor this, hoping they'll find one another again when they return home. That even if they forget this memory, they won't forget how it made them feel. ]
It is. All I want is to know that you accept me as I really am. No more lies or words unspoken.
[ He has nothing left to hide from him, and hopefully, Dimitri feels the same. ]
Can we celebrate your birthday properly now? Stay. Eat with me.
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